Organic Lover

I knew this would be difficult. I expected the release of energy to fill my system with feelings. This is a challenge to the mental state of my mind, and clarity of my soul. My conscious choice against being a part of an addicted generation. I want to stand apart from the crowd and if that means standing alone, then alone I shall stand. Day by day. The lone wolf keeps climbing. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. What will you leave behind when you die?

I've been making choices for 26 years. I have talked myself into and out of every kind of situation. I have always known right from wrong, although not always did I follow what may be known as the right path. For about half my life I have been a smoker. It began in middle school and has succeeded in taking over my life. I have tried to quit dozens of times. You could say that I have not tried hard enough. Today, like many other days, I choose to quit once again. Why will this time be different? Because I am different. I am mentally stronger now than ever before. I have learned how to tap into my subconscious and make peace with my past. A past that connects to betrayal and the feeling of lose. I understand that the next few days and weeks will be a challenge. I also know that I am ready for this challenge. I am ready to become to best woman that I can be. I am ready to share my love with the world and not fear judgement. I understand that feelings of shame and hurt will arise whi...